Pizza Hut on Wheels
I'm jumping on the Google Patents bandwagon here, but there are worse things than being Bandwagonesque.

In 1990, our friends at the then super-power of shitty delivery pizza, Pizza Hut, developed and patented a "Compact Pizza Preparation and Delivery Vehicle".

It's a Chevy S-10 pickup with an oven and a cell phone.

From the patent brief:

A compact pizza preparation and delivery vehicle comprising:

-a pickup truck comprising a driver's compartment with a driver's seat, a cargo bed behind the driver's compartment, an engine; and a battery and alternator for supplying electrical power to the engine;
-means for receiving pizza delivery orders while in transit;
-a topper to cover the cargo bed and form a cargo compartment;
-a refrigerated case located in the driver's compartment within access of a driver in the driver's seat for storing pizza shells and pizza toppings;
-an assembly table located on top of the refrigerated case upon which an uncooked pizza shell is placed while pizza toppings are applied thereto;
-a pizza oven in the cargo bed which is adapted and positioned so that, while sitting in the driver's seat, a driver can insert an unbaked assembled pizza into the oven and remove a baked pizza from the oven and wherein the pizza oven comprises:

-a baking chamber
-fan means for impelling heated air
-an oven door
-a turntable upon which the pizza is rotated about its center
-at least one upper slot in the baking chamber through which heated air is impelled toward the top of the pizza as it is rotated on the turntable
-at least one bottom slot in the baking chamber through which heated air is impelled toward the bottom of the pizza as it is rotated on the turntable
-an oven controller means including a timer means for setting a proper baking cycle for each pizza.

I reiterate that you simply cannot make this kind of shit up.

I encourage you to read the whole patent. I sort of don't get the deal with it. I understand the need for hot, fresh pizza, but the likelihood of my driver dying in a horrible collision while trying to pull a pie from the oven seems pretty fucking high. I suppose this didn't work out as the pizza revolution they'd intended. Maybe we can still look forward to cooking our pizzas in our Black and Decker rehydrater.
- posted by Mason @ 7:52 PM